Now I Know Why St. Joseph Had To Die
Fatherhood is a Weighty Thing
St. Joseph, the husband of the Virgin Mary and the legal father of Jesus, is absent from most of the New Testament’s writings. He is not referenced in any of the Epistles, and all mention of him as an active member of the story stops after the account of the 12-year-old Christ visiting the temple (Luke 2:41-52). There is one additional mention of him in the sixth chapter of John where the Jews grumble about Jesus. However, that is only a passing reference to the fact that they, the angry, unbelieving Jews, personally knew—or knew of—Jesus’s mother and father and were thus upset over Christ’s claim that he had come down from heaven (John 6:41-42).
His absence is an interesting thing to consider, and it has admittedly been something that I have rarely, if ever, heard mentioned throughout my time within Evangelical circles. Luckily, as I have surveyed the various other Protestant denominations and Christian traditions (Roman Catholicism and Eastern Orthodoxy), there are ample speculations and writings on the topic. Typically, the death of St. Joseph is taken as a simple, implied fact. Most people take Christ’s words to St. John the Evangelist— “Behold, your son!”—to be nigh explicit confirmation that St. Joseph is deceased; otherwise, why would Jesus entrust the care of his mother to a disciple? One can also pair this with the historically common belief that Joseph was older than Mary by either a couple of years or a couple decades. A marriage between an older man and a younger woman was not out of the ordinary in the Ancient Middle East during the time of the Gospel narrative. So, with the age difference in full consideration, an older Joseph passing away before Jesus began his ministry at the age of 30 is not something that can be flippantly dismissed. Ultimately though, even if Joseph was the same age as Mary, his absence is still, nevertheless, perhaps best explained by death.
The question then stands: Why? Why was the death of St. Joseph part of God’s sovereign plan for the life and ministry of our Lord Jesus Christ?
I think I have an answer. And it came from X (formerly Twitter) of all places. I wish I could go back and find the original post so that I can give the user some credit, but in essence the post said this: “God blessed Joseph with death because what man would be able to sit idly by and watch his son be crucified?”
I became a father last year. My wife and I endured a miscarriage in January of 2024, so we have been parents since then—to an undoubtedly beautiful boy or girl who we named Keller Bethel Courtney—but by God’s good graces we got pregnant again pretty immediately thereafter and gave birth to Elijah Grant Courtney on December 19th, 2024, at approximately 3:53 P.M. With Elijah we have been able to enjoy and experience parenthood in a way that we were unfortunately unable to with Keller, who was only with us for seven rich and wonderful weeks. Although my parenting journey began not too long ago, I cannot imagine offering up either of my children for anything. Heck, there are few things I would not do to meet Keller this side of eternity despite believing that he or she is already experiencing the glory of God in a way that neither I nor Lauren will for hopefully many more years to come. And the thought of anyone laying a hand on Elijah boils my blood to an extent that I frankly did not expect. I mean, I expected it a little. But to this extent? Wow. I would do very violent things if someone tried to lay a hand on Elijah. Much less can I even conceptualize letting Elijah be sacrificed. The story of Abraham, Isaac, and the ram in the thicket takes on a whole new level of depth and challenge when I contemplate it. And, I can only—barely—imagine what St. Joseph would have felt seeing his son hit, flogged, and crucified.
Admittedly, if I was in St. Joseph’s place and lived to see my son treated like that I do not believe that I could have held back. It is purely speculation, but maybe that’s why God took him out of the equation when he did, and if that is the case, then what a great gift that was.